Confidence

Today, confidence took on a whole new meaning for me.
Moving on in spite of the fear, that is wrapping it claws around your heart.
The fear that makes you gasp for breath, that causes your heart to skip a beat.
The fear that causes you to become wet with perspiration.
The fear that seems to rationalize quitting.
True confidence is moving on in spite of that. And the truth is confidence works.
I faced my fear, and went for the audition and sang with my eyes open, and it seemed like they liked it.
I won’t know the result until later, but I hope I got in.

#AtoZChallenge – C is for Church, Choir, Competition…..

The letter C is the beginning of 8,036 words (this ignores the start of c in the dictionary) according to Yahoo answers, and I could only think of three to talk about.
Church to me is a gathering of people all interested in worshipping God in a collective, orderly manner and place.
1 Corinthians 12:27-28 talks about us(Christians) being the church. That means the church is not a building but a person, not one person but all who have accepted the message of Christ into their hearts, they are the church. With that knowledge and acceptance there is peace and joy and happiness, to be found in the church i.e in ourselves. And when I say ourselves I don’t mean all the eastern philosophy of finding inner peace, or centering yourself, I mean Christ in us.
I have spoken about the choir before here, and it is one of the most amazing experiences of my life. It truly is a joy to be among all those people. And best of all (after months of begging and pleading and attempted bribery) I manage to convince two of my friends to audition, and I’m just getting news that they got in.
This evening I’m going for an audition (singing obviously) for a competition created by a member of my choir, and I don’t think I’ve experienced jitters this bad. I know I’ve won a competition in my former school, but the talent here is daunting. But I read an article yesterday about how Olympians and Marines train their minds to handle any situation, and the number one rule was always speak positively to yourself. So I’m going to go there confident (albeit shaky but still there) and give the best that God has given me.

#AtoZchallenge – Bullying

My dictionary defines bullying as
1.An act of intimidating  a weaker person to do something, especially such repeated coercion .
2.Persistent acts intended to make life unpleasant for another person.
I am surrounded by bullies (i.e self proclaimed), at least emotionally. Although it is mostly joking, sometimes it hurts.
Right now I and my friends are discussing real bullying, and the many forms it takes. It could be physical, emotional, social or otherwise.
We admit that all forms of bullying are bad, we agree that emotional bullying (according to us) is the worst.
I agree because the signs are, not visible or they could be misconstrued for introverted, while the person is dying inside.
I don’t have the literary grace to wax long about this, but my stand is clear this is wrong and it should stop.

#AtoZChallenge: A is for American Idol

The farewell season of American Idol has just concluded, with Trent Harmon being crowned the last winner over La Porsha.
I as an individual feel both happy and sad. Happy that someone’s dreams came true, and sad that the person was not La Porsha.
I almost bet on La Porsha the night before the final, because her talent was just breath taking (that is not to say that Trent didn’t also have talent, I just supported La Porsha)
This afternoon when I told my friend who won, he asked me “what did you expect?, they can’t let a black person win the last round”
I personally don’t think the winners choice was racially motivated, but we are a historically maligned people, so I can understand his POV.
But through it all I congratulate Trent Harmon on his win, and hope that La Porsha finds her footing because she is just that good.

Prayer

I am totally confused right now. This morning I woke up this morning to pray, and because my roommate was in the room, I decided to pray in my mind.
Now, I know the mind is a place of distraction, and today was the day it decided to prove itself. Random things I normally wouldn’t even think to think of, were just running through my head. So I had to keep pulling my mind back on track.
After that I began thinking if my prayer was void, so I said to myself I’ll pray again.
My basic question is “How do you avoid distractions in the place of prayer”?